In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s mind there are few.” – Shunry Suzuki
Yesterday I heard a speaker describe the principle of the beginner’s mind. While it has many names like fresh eyes and true nature, it is about looking with childlike eyes. Looking with eyes filled with awe and wonder, and endowed with curiosity about everything.
What a perfect way to enter every relating opportunity. Instead of knowing how dreadful “dating” can be and avoiding it like the plague, the beginner’s mind looks at opportunities to learn and grow with another person.
What would happen if you were genuinely curious about every one you met? If instead of dismissing a person because of his/her outward appearance, you were interested in finding the treasure that person was in your life?
I hear many singles say the ultimate sexiness is someone who can listen and show genuine interest in who they are. Just that much interest, a little bit of caring can make all the difference.
Next time you have a relating opportunity, see the person with fresh eyes, with a beginner’s mind. Be curious. Ask questions. Discover something new.
If you are intimated by starting conversations, or are unsure of how to ask good questions, I suggest reading Intellectual Foreplay by Eve Eschner Hogan, M.A.
I see a lot of people dismiss others because they are not the right “type”. Instead of really looking for the other person as a precious gift, they only saw the wrong hair color or body type.
Look for the treasure! The next person you meet may be your new best friend, or perfect for your best friend, or perhaps even the perfect partner for you.